Monday, June 21, 2004
Don't Make Us Come Back
We thought we were going to close down for good.
We had a lot of fun reviewing blogs and offering our not-so-humble opinions. However, it was taking WAY too long for some of us to read all the nonsense out there. Plus, one of us really wanted to impress a guitarist who tendered us a death threat. When that rock star's email address was posted by our staff for all Christendom to see, the negative effects on this particular contributor's non-existent dating life got in the way and we decided to hang our chappeaus.
Some of us were enjoying our retirements at The Shore Club in Miami Beach, where we would engage in inane conversations with models on their downward spiral of sex, drugs, and being squired by club owners. Others were spending their evenings negotiating the perilous journey from Da Silvano's to PM, all the time trying to avoid inane conversations with models trying to find someone to finance their downward spiral of sex and drugs.
Then the Internet called.
It said "Help us, Anti-Blog Blogger! Now the comments on blogs are becoming stupid! Save us!". And with that, we searched our closets for our masks and capes and began our patrols once more, only this time we are focusing on the comments of each entry.
"It's a lot of work", one of us grumbled. And so it is. But we're almost up to the task. We don't like the fact that this will take away prime drinking time at Mynt or Serafina's. So, before we begin, we're going to issue a warning to the masses: If you don't stop with arrogant, self-righteous comments on equally absurd blogs, YOU will be targeted.
Don't make us do it. This time, it's going to be brutal.
We had a lot of fun reviewing blogs and offering our not-so-humble opinions. However, it was taking WAY too long for some of us to read all the nonsense out there. Plus, one of us really wanted to impress a guitarist who tendered us a death threat. When that rock star's email address was posted by our staff for all Christendom to see, the negative effects on this particular contributor's non-existent dating life got in the way and we decided to hang our chappeaus.
Some of us were enjoying our retirements at The Shore Club in Miami Beach, where we would engage in inane conversations with models on their downward spiral of sex, drugs, and being squired by club owners. Others were spending their evenings negotiating the perilous journey from Da Silvano's to PM, all the time trying to avoid inane conversations with models trying to find someone to finance their downward spiral of sex and drugs.
Then the Internet called.
It said "Help us, Anti-Blog Blogger! Now the comments on blogs are becoming stupid! Save us!". And with that, we searched our closets for our masks and capes and began our patrols once more, only this time we are focusing on the comments of each entry.
"It's a lot of work", one of us grumbled. And so it is. But we're almost up to the task. We don't like the fact that this will take away prime drinking time at Mynt or Serafina's. So, before we begin, we're going to issue a warning to the masses: If you don't stop with arrogant, self-righteous comments on equally absurd blogs, YOU will be targeted.
Don't make us do it. This time, it's going to be brutal.
